Are You Doing These & Don’t Know It?
We could all use better relationships. That got me thinking about 4 Hidden Relationship Mistakes I’ve learned to spot for Alphas.
These are things that you just aren’t noticing but you should be.
First up, The Math Mistake.
What? Yes. Math!
Last Month Was Powerful Talk About Weakness. Catch Up Here: Vulnerability Gives Strength, Love, Information and Truth
Look at the Whole – Not Just the Sexy Bits
We did heavy work on truth and that will be helpful here.
In any relationship, love, friends, family and business, you SHOULD be looking at how its going. Getting a bird’s eye view of things. You know I love my 1-10 scales. Use them!
This is where you look at their “performance” just like a car, employee or stock to see how you are doing. Why? Because otherwise you’ll entrench bad behavior if there is some. The longer you let bad things happen unaccounted for, the harder it is to ASK for better treatment in the future. Heck, the harder it is for you to EVEN NOTICE the bad behavior! You normalize it.
I can now see that I never liked to look TOO closely, for fear of seeing something I didn’t like, that I’d have to take action on.
Teach This to Anyone You Love (Including YOU)
This is simple. Do you weight the “highs” of the relationship MORE than the “lows”? If so, you are setting yourself up for misery. You are locking yourself into “emotional roller coasters of doom.”
The Math is really about AWARENESS + TRUTH. I want you to notice if there are low numbers, especially if these are repeat issues. If you’ve communicated about these low spots, that means they refuse to learn, take responsibility or change. These are important things for you to be aware of.
I was guilty of this. When I was being loved, that was amazing. They were amazing! If they started to hurt me, I decided it was a random exception. An outlier. A “tough spot” for them. The Math can tell you the truth.
Battered women are our extreme examples. They focus on the parts where he’s behaving, the honeymoon period and forget the violence. Soo many of us do the same thing on an emotional abuse scale.
You CAN stop and I promise if you look, you’ll spot the same roller coaster you are GETTING, coming from how YOU show up for YOU.
I was a 9 for me except when I was a 2 while rescuing someone else. See it? Awareness + Truth. Do The Math.
you vulnerable enough to see who YOU really are?
The Math Can Tell You the Truth
Do You Want It?
P.S. I cannot tell you how powerful The Math is. Alphas are analytical. This is a good time to engage your head love. If you suspect you won’t like the outcome you should really do it. Teach a young Alpha you know this one thing an save her years of heartache. I’m on my way Stateside! Time for U.S.Wedding Vows with my family and a roadtrip. We are calling it the Vows & Bourbon 2019 Tour as we are heading through TN and KY distilleries (Jim Beam, Jack Daniels, Nashville) and….DOLLYWOOD! I’ve always wanted to visit our American Bald Eagles. They have a Bird Wildlife Center inside. If you check them out, click adopt to see the birds!
Tanya Stewart is “The Alpha Woman Coach” and began coaching strong women as a Divorce lawyer in her own high conflict law firm 20 years ago. She understands how Alpha women are wired and using her Master’s level Metaphysics background and Advanced Clinical Certification in Hypnotherapy, she brings rapid change to people she works with. She is a speaker, published author and Mensa member whose coaching is recommended by the World-Famous Motivator, Les Brown, Best-Selling Love Coach Greg Baer and International Change Expert, Dr. Eldon Taylor. She can teach you to separate struggle from success. ALL My videos are always on my Vimeo channel HERE Find Even More on the Resources page of the website: www.FearlessFocusCoaching.com/Resources