I always teach from my own life. What two NEW things did I do last week?
Start attending a Pilates Mat class and go to a Dance Mediation Group.
What’s fun is that these two things seem to be for helping the BODY but you can use them to train your MIND too!
Here’s how to use The Noticer Tool:
- Pick some new group/class/event to go to that you have little experience in
- Go and NOTICE Your Monkey Mind, Your Ego’s chatter – Your Self Talk
- GENTLY make it a little NICER
Whatever you are doing to others (judging, criticizing, comparing) you are ALWAYS doing to yourself FIRST.
(Yes, this is the twin of the law, you cannot GIVE to others what you haven’t GIVEN to yourself First. I promise, you have ALREADY GIVEN to yourself, whatever you are about to GIVE to others. So if it’s bad, that’s bad.)
You becoming NICER in your head is all about YOU and your happiness and your goals working with less struggle.
Tanya Goes to Pilates Class
I have been out of the gym rehabbing my knees for months, so this is how I chose to return. Screw LOW Impact, NO impact, thank you!
Except…I went on Wednesday. Little did I know, Wednesday is Pilates of the Gods Day. You’d have thought Iwas a Pilates Instructor certification exam – brutal.
My Head? I’m proud, it’s well managed. As I looked at my own pretzeled self at others, I saw skill, flexibility and freaking MASTERY.
I knew years ago, I would’ve just made snarky comments about soccer moms with nothing better to do than rock out 3 min planks all day.
There was exactly ONE heavy woman in the room by me. I cheered for her. I respected her in moments when she had to rest. I knew old me would’ve placed her “below” me on the Pilates totem pole to FEEL better.
The kind instructor apologized for my coming to “a Wednesday class” for my very first time. You know how instructors will give you one or two variations on a move to make it really hard? (she called them teasers, see they have a lingo!) I’d say 70% of the class did every hardest version annnnnddddd HELD IT.
I could tell where I needed to push and I could tell where Tanya was done.
Old me would’ve been wondering what they thought of me having to rock in a fetal position (twice) to recover. Current me, imagined me reminding them of how far they’ve come since THEY started and looked just like ME.
Tanya Goes dancing Mediation Called Five Rhythms
My ego must’ve researched while I wasn’t looking and had a ready list of things to be concerned about – from 30 pairs of sweaty feet on the same floor to the deeply, spiritually woo-woo taking up way too much space with their dancing!
I just…noticed it. And it faded. Soon I began to look and allow. Look and accept. Look for things to PRAISE. A great figure. Flowy skirt. A couple dancing. I was awed at how we all were doing our own dance but it SOMEHOW flowed into a group pattern.
Remember: You are NOT the author of judgy thoughts, so you don’t have to claim them, keep them or feed them.
I danced for 2 hours and sweated and stomped and spun and felt SEXY and powerful and loved. My knees held up!
When you next find yourself in any new situation where you will be tempted to compare, judge or criticize pull out your Noticing Tool.
See how much you can just NOTICE what your head is saying until you can gently shift it to something you could say OUT LOUD.
Whatever you are giving to others, you first gave to YOURSELF.
P.S.I’ve coached you before to tell you to go Find Something to SUCK AT! Do new things, notice your head, manage your head. Trust me, what your head will do in a Pilates class, it will do in a business meeting and in your relationship. Want help with that?
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