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[Emotions] 4 Steps: How to FIND in a LOSS

How to FIND in a LOSS

We’ve all been in a place where once solid ground shifted right beneath our feet.

The job. The marriage. The friendship. The business deal you’ve spent hours and hours on. Your health or the health of a partner.

You can use my 4 Step Process for more than just decision making. You can use it for going through a loss.

  1. Commitment
  2. Clarity (Truth)
  3. Choices
  4. Inspired Action

Here is the amazing part. There is literally no way to do this wrong. If you go through the 4 steps, you will feel better in some way.

Commitment. It is having a process is what will soothe you. You can commit to getting through the day (or the next 5 minutes if it’s really bad), feeling better or trusting God about the presence of this event. Just pick something to commit to. Commitments deliver Clarity. I will use trusting the Universe, as it’s my dominant lesson right now as an example.

Clarity.  This is where you tell yourself the truth. In the case of a loss, tell yourself any truth that surfaces when you say your commitment out loud to yourself a few times.  When I do this, what comes clear is that I don’t need to fix this right NOW. This minute.  I don’t need “solution.” I don’t need to feel better right this minute.

Choices. That truth will cut down your choices from so many you don’t know what to do next, to 2 usually.  When I follow the truth of “I don’t need to fix this (and indeed it may not be fixable) this moment” my choices are:  Let it be whatever it is for the moment and stop pushing at it or I can give my attention to something else that needs it more this moment that I CAN fix.

Inspired Action.  One counter intuitive action that hearts often suggest is…do nothing. Be. Relax. That is because the heart, connected to Source, KNOWS you are not in danger and in fact there is a specific reason and lesson behind whatever happened.  When you ask for an inspired action, you are looking to receive the first thought, feeling, nuance, image. If it’s a “sentence”, it’s your head not your heart. And it may be VERY strange.

I asked for an inspired action at a workshop in California once with over 400 people. I got “Dance.” During the next break, they played my favorite song and I…got up and danced in the aisle and 5 or 6 others joined me! And another 10 were cheering us on. 🙂 Don’t judge your “action”. Just do it as Nike would say.

Doing this process in the face of a loss will help you find and feel something you don’t have right now, some control. So do it as often as you need. I have had days so terrible that I went through them 5 minutes at a time, because that was the best I could do.

Today is Day 12 of The Self-Love Summit. Last day. We have an interview with Dr. Danielle Dowling talking about How to Break Bad Cycles & Handle Disappointments that is phenomenal. It will get you back on track.

Also, starting Saturday morning ALL 24 interviews are available on open replay. It’s the best time to dive in, grab a nugget or two and give yourself a boost this weekend.

Get whatever tool works for you and just manage this moment and you’ll get through any disappointment or loss. Be gentle with yourself.

Love you!

P.S. If you are having a hard time with something right now, send me a few sentences and I’ll send you back a little direction. When I give understanding and support, I get understanding and support.

All 24 Interviews are on REPLAY Sat-MonTheSelfLoveBlueprint.Com

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